Darlene Curlee Coaching
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You get what you expect

7/29/2019

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I know a man who is very choosey about where he parks. In large parking lots, he always parks in a spot away from other vehicles so that no one is next to him. Yet, nearly every time he returns to his vehicle there are cars all around his.  This does not please him.  What he does not realize is that his thinking, and what he says attracts the very thing he does not want.  What he is doing is unknowingly using the Law of Attraction. 
 
After parking away from others, he’ll say, “Now watch, when we come back there won’t be any empty spaces around us.” What he really wants is to be parked and have his vehicle remain alone, without anyone parking near him. But he is receiving exactly what he expects.
 
The universe doesn’t understand “not”. It just understands that the spaces around him will be filled. Saying, “I don’t want to park near any cars” won’t give the results he wants either. It would be better to declare, “I love and enjoy the space surrounding my vehicle” and feel it with gratitude. 
 
Expectation is a strong belief that something will happen or will be true in the future. It’s a vibration that acts as an attractive force. Even though he didn’t want it to happen, his belief was so strong that it would happen, that it did happen.
 
Being aware of the power of this attractive force of thought, expectation, is the key to realizing a different result. When we adjust our thinking to having an expectation of a good or positive result, the outcome will be desirable. It’s really important to be careful what you are thinking and what you are expecting because the Law of Attraction, being always at work, gives you exactly what you ask for, whether you know it or not.
 
If you are expecting something bad to happen, you probably won’t be disappointed. The opposite is also true. When you are expecting good, that’s what you will receive. When we expect our children to get good grades, they will perform to our expectations. Are you just hoping for a good outcome, but fear it won’t happen? Any doubt or fear always negates. Be clear in your mind about what you are expecting.
 
Having a negative expectation is an expression of fear. It’d be like saying, “I’m afraid that when we return there will be cars parked all around me.” The Bible tells us, “the thing which I greatly fear is come upon me.” This is not a new concept. Replacing fear with a positive belief will alter your result.
 
Expectation and belief are powerful. We must learn to watch our thinking so that we can attract and enjoy what we truly desire. 
 
Create a new habit of catching yourself before you think or say a negative statement and ask yourself, “what am I expecting to happen?”. To attract the good you desire you must always expect that it will happen.

Photo by John Matychuk on Unsplash

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Three Simple Steps to Enhance Your Life and Reach Your Goals

7/22/2019

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​Creating your best life and achieving your goals requires a change in thinking and a change in habits. The following three ideas are simple things you can bring into your life right away that will have a great impact on improving your life. 
 
Gratitude Journal
In order to receive more in our lives, we must be grateful for what we already have. No matter how much you have, or how little you think you have, be truly grateful for it. When you are grateful it opens your thinking to receive. It must be a genuine gratitude for even the simplest things in your life; the warm sun on your face, the smile of a child, your feet that take you where you need to go. 
 
To keep gratitude on your mind, have a gratitude journal. Everyday write down at least ten things that you’re grateful for. It can be something you already have or something you are expecting to come into your life. It can be big or small. Write freely and let the gratitude your feeling flow onto the paper.
 
If you’re new at this or don’t know how to start, you can start simply. “I’m grateful for my hand to write this with.” “I’m grateful for my eyes to see with.” Or what’s obvious, “I’m grateful for my family”, “I’m grateful for my home”, “for the bed to sleep in”. The more you do it, the easier it gets and the more you will find to be grateful for. Make a habit of doing this every day, it is a transformational habit.
 
Using Affirmations
Affirmations are positive statements, that when used repeatedly, will improve the mindset and thinking of the person using them. It is a way of reprograming your habitual way of thinking. To be effective, an affirmation should always be in the present tense and stated as though it’s already true. It must not contain any negative words. For example, “not” or “won’t”, or even a word with a negative meaning like debt, should not be included in an affirmation.
 
When you have created your affirmation, repeat it throughout the day and do it with feeling. This is really important. Make this affirmation part of you. Claim it. Believe it. Know that it’s true. You must not have any doubt that this is your reality.
 
When you add gratitude to your affirmation, it makes it even more powerful. A great example is, “I am so happy and grateful now that money easily and abundantly comes into my life.” Or, “I am so happy and grateful now that I am enjoying a fulfilling relationship with someone who truly respects and loves me.” There is no limit to the affirmations you can create.
 
Using affirmations is a simple and impactful tool that you can use to help you get the results you’re seeking in your life. That’s why I’ve created a handout for you, so that you can easily start using them today. This handout also gives you tips on creating your own and how to make affirmations effective. Click hereto have the “Affirmations Handout” emailed directly to you.
 
Vision Board
We think in pictures and because we do, creating a vision board or a dream board, is a great way to keep pictures of what you want to attract into your life in front of your thought. These can be pictures illustrating your goal or they can be about your affirmations. 
 
If your goal is to live in a house on the coast, find a picture of the type of coastal home you would love to live in. Maybe it depicts the home by the water or interior photos looking out so that you can see it’s clearly a coastal home. If your goal is to travel the world, have photos of places you want to visit on the board. Maybe you want to receive an award for something. Use a picture of the award or prize and impose it on a photo of you. Words are OK too as they will visually stand out but be clear about what they mean to you. Use photos as description of those words.
 
Get creative. You can find pictures in magazines or online. Build a board that completely and clearly represents what you want and what you love. You can use a poster board, a foam board or a scrapbook. It can evolve and change as you do and as you reach your goals. Put it where you will see it every day and where you can touch it every day. You want this to be real for you, a concrete representation of your dreams.
 
All three of these ideas are powerful tools that will help you reach your goals or attract to you what you want in your life. You can implement one of them or all of them. If you want to use all of them, do one at a time. You want to create a new habit of these and do so in a way that you will stick with it. Too many changes at once will tend to overwhelm and not be lasting. Ease into these with a committed decision, don’t quit and you will see wonderful improvements in your life.
 
I would love to hear how you used these ideas in your life and their impact on you. Email me or come back and comment below and share your success with creating a habit out of any of these suggestions.

Photo by Jake Hills on Unsplash

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Get unstuck and find your freedom

7/7/2019

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​Have you ever felt stuck? Stuck in a certain situation, or stuck at your place in life? Are you unhappy where you are but just don’t know how to improve things so that you can be happy and live a better life? The desire for more or for better than you are currently experiencing is natural. Spirit, which is in each one of us, is always seeking greater expansion. 
 
We were not put on this earth to struggle, to live a non-fulfilling life of drudgery. You don’t need to feel guilty because you want more or aren’t happy where you are. Recognize that it is your spirit that is seeking more for you. Just because you want something other than what you have, doesn’t mean you’re not grateful for what you have. You can be grateful and still want something else. If fact, when we’re not grateful for what we already have, then we aren’t ready to receive more.
 
To move forward and find the freedom you desire and deserve, ask yourself, “What is holding me back?” When understanding how our thinking controls our life, one can realize it usually comes down to our own limiting beliefs. These beliefs may not even have originated within you. Well-meaning parents often pass down limiting beliefs they’ve inherited. Parents raised during the depression are more apt to have a scarcity mindset. They think you have to get a good job and work hard to make money and are often conservative. Culture, economic conditions, adversity and world events all play a large role in forming limiting beliefs, and they are passed down because these beliefs have been bought into. These parents were doing the best they knew how with the awareness that they had. 
 
Now you know better. You don’t have to accept these beliefs, this habitual way of thinking. You can create a better life for yourself. Start by allowing yourself to dream. Think about what it is you really want. What do you dream about in your heart of hearts? What gets you excited?  What do you love to do? Find your passions in your dreams. Then visualize yourself in what you dream. See yourself there. Write, think and say what your dream is in the present tense, like it’s already happened. Repeat it over and over. This is the basis to changing habits, to changing thinking and attracting what you want into your life. That’s how you make your dream a reality.  
 
Whatever challenges are presented, are opportunities for growth. The lessons learned after going through or overcoming a challenge allow one to become bigger than they were. When coming out on the other side of that lesson, you’re not the same, you’ve grown in some way and have more clarity, a better sense of direction as you discover what you do or don’t want. Learning what you don’t want, helps to bring clarity about what you do want. Always look for the lesson in a challenge. There is always something good to come from it. You may have to dig just a little deeper to find it. A challenge is just a learning experience where you will come out on the other side, a better person.
 
Never let your challenges take away your dreams. The vision of what can be will give you the strength to carry on through the difficulties. Know that if you can dream it, you can do it. Your freedom is just on the other side of breaking through whatever challenge or problem you may be encountering in your life. The freedom and life you seek is waiting for you. Change your mind, change your thinking and take action to move forward in your life and you will find the freedom that you truly desire and that you totally deserve. 

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Photo by Mario Azzi on Unsplash

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Be a daydreamer

7/1/2019

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​When I was in 3rd grade I sat by the window for part of the year. I loved sitting by the window, staring out into the playground, thinking about what I would do come recess, dreaming some other dreams. The teacher, who happened to be one of my favorites, wrote on my report card that I daydreamed out the window. It wasn’t long before she moved me to the other side of the room. It felt so dark there. 
 
Daydreaming is really being creative. This is where we create our fantasies and fantasy is the first stage in creation. Everything was once just an idea in someone’s imagination, from the simplest table to the most complex computer. It all starts in the imagination.
 
Imagination is a powerful mental tool available to all of us. Some of us may have more developed imaginations than others, but we all have one. We are naturally creative beings. We can create the life we want; we can create objects or create ideas. With our thinking minds, we can literally create anything.
 
Using our imagination, our creative mind, we can see our self doing, being or having whatever we can dream. “If you can dream it, you can do it.” We don’t get ideas to do something that we aren’t able to do. 
 
When you have an idea that you love, ask yourself, “Am I willing?” and “Am I able?” to do this. Everyone is able to do something. There are great examples of people who appear handicapped that show the world they have no limitations. People may think they are not able when really it is that they are not willing. You have to be willing to do whatever it takes to make that dream a reality. That may mean learning a new skill, finding financing, or getting help. Until you can answer yes to both these questions, your dream will just stay a fantasy and will not be realized in your life and in your world.
 
We never want to stop someone from using their imagination or from being creative. So many gadgets these days, already inhibit the use of imagination. It is a precious resource that should be developed and encouraged to use. 
 
Your imagination is the key to your achieving great things in your life. Don’t ever stop dreaming or daydreaming. Often, we’ve been so wrapped up in our busy lives that our dreams are put on the back burner and we quit dreaming. Just imagine what your life could look like if you went back to daydreaming. What is YOUR dream?

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